One of my readers, Shanda Springfield, recently emailed me this beautiful poem written from the depths of the heart of a mother waiting for her arms to be filled. Shanda, thank you for putting so many of our feelings to words. I pray this peom will bless all of you as it did me:
My heart cries out in anguish
For the child I haven't conceived
Why do I feel such sorrow,
How can I be so grieved?
Like a part of me is missing
Yet it was never even here,
I always thought it was time
To hold my child so dear.
I lie awake most nights
Pondering how it should be,
"By my age," I always said,
"I'll have two or three."
Life never seems to turn out
The way I want it to
But I know God's plan is perfect,
And his love forever true.
There are still those who criticize
And tell me all I'm doing wrong,
I'm learning to ignore them,
They will not steal my song.
I have faith in God
I believe his will is best,
But still I am human
And go through many tests.
With all this said, I pray today,
"Not my will, but thine,
I am only a branch,
But, Lord, you are the vine."
by: Shanda Springfield
May 25, 2005
Shanda hopes to start up an infertility support group in Monroe, Louisiana in October, 2005. For more information, email Shanda at springer1222@bellsouth.net.
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A friend and co-worker has been trying for over a year to get pregnant. She just found out yesterday that her little sister is pregnant and even though she is excited for her sister she feels terrible. Then there is the guilt that goes along with feeling terrible that your sister is pregnant and not you. Im so glad I found this poem to share with her. She is very strong in her faith and I know this will help her. Thank you.
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