Thursday, May 31, 2007

For Such a Time as This?

I am a Regional Manager with a mineral makeup company. In a recent traing chat there, one of the other 5 ladies I was chatting with mentioned her recent miscarriage. We all expressed our sympathies, then one of the other gals told her to feel free to contact her any time because she had a stillborn baby girl 8 years ago. The first rep (who just miscarried) replied that her first son had been stillborn as well! I was able to tell them both about Hannah's Hope and Hannah's Prayer Ministries. As the chat unfolded, I just sat there praying and asking the Lord what are the odds that out of 6 ladies, 3 of us have lost babies, 2 to stillbirth?

I don't know all the reasons God has put me in the position that He has with Mineral Girlz (though I'm having a blast and very excited about the business side of things), but I can't help wonder if at least a part of the picture has to do with these two ladies and their losses? Could I be there for such a time as this? (Esther's story has been one I've pondered much this year.) Please pray for both of these ladies and my sensitivity to God's promtings for any ways He might have me minister in their lives as we work together.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

One Pastor Shares His Reflections on Mother's Day

Rev. Lamar Oliver of Pharr Chapel United Methodist Church in Morgan City, LA sends out weekly devotional messages to members of his church. Here is what he wrote this week:

Normally, your Mid-Week Message is composed on Wednesday mornings, but while sitting here watching television with Erin this evening, I saw the most ridiculous commercial that got us talking about worship this Sunday. One of the seemingly endless jewelry store ads shown during this week every year, it reminded viewers that "You only have one day to celebrate mom - so make it special." How utterly stupid and absolutely contrary to not only good sense and manners, but also to the Christian faith that we profess to live under. This mindset, however, is one of the reasons why this Sunday, Mother's Day, is one of the most dangerous for pastors and also one of the most misunderstood days in the life of the church.

I will never forget the first Mother's Day that I had in my first post-seminary appointment. We were in the midst of the Easter season, and I preached from the lectionary texts for the day. It was about two o'clock that afternoon when my phone rang, and the matriarch of the congregation was on the phone asking me why I did not preach about mothers on Mother's Day. Who did I think I was? After all, "People go to church on Mother's Day with mom expecting a sermon on motherhood, moms, and how great it all is." Her tone indicated that there was no way I could give an answer that would satisfy her, but she did get me thinking. How should we communicate to people that the church is to be a place of worship - worship of God, not anyone else (even mom)? How should we communicate that if you have to wait until Mother's Day to let mom know how much she means to you then you don't have much of a relationship with mom to begin with? How should we communicate that when the church makes a big deal about the oldest mother and the youngest mother that chances are very good that there are women sitting in the pews who are inwardly weeping (if they show up at all on this day) because they know that they will never be a mother, never have a chance at the award for oldest, youngest, or most prolific mother? How do we communicate that while Mother's Day is the day on which the most phone calls are made that there are women in our midst who will not get that phone call from a beloved child this year because they had to endure every mother's nightmare of outliving their child? How do we communicate that there are many mothers and children who have no relationship at all and all that this day does is bring pain and sorrow for pain that in some cases goes back decades? How do we communicate this message to those for whom for whom Mother's Day is hard because they will not be able to call mom this year since mom has passed away?

This Sunday, as is the case every Sunday, we will gather to worship God. We will gather to give thanks for everything that God has done, is doing, and will do. Mother's Day will be recognized - but in the context of a God who is much bigger than anything we can imagine. Let us remember that Sunday, like every day, is not about any one or anything but the triune God.

Planning to make a big deal about mom on Mother's Day? Why wait. Call mom now. Write mom now. Send flowers now. Don't wait to be prompted by Madison Avenue. Planning to hide from the world on Mother's Day because of the pain of the day? Know that I am in prayer for you now.

Either way, join us for worship this Sunday as we explore again the God who not only provides the great things in life, but also is big enough to get us through the most difficult times in life.


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To contact Rev. Oliver, please email pastor@pharrchapelumc.org or visit his website at www.pharrchapelumc.org.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Mother's Day Survival and "Is God Punishing Me?"

As we count down this last week before Mother's Day, my heart is keenly aware of what a painful season May and June can be for men and women longing to hold their children. Praying God's comfort for each grieving heart.

On the Hannah's Prayer Community Forums I am posting monthly devotionals based on various chapters of Hannah's Hope. Here's the third in this series.

The following is copyrighted material and has been adapted from "Is God Punishing Me?" chapter three of Hannah's Hope: Seeking God's Heart in the Midst of Infertility, Miscarriage, & Adoption Loss by Jennifer Saake, NavPress, 2005. Please do not duplicate without permission. You may read a portion of this book here.


Year after year this man went up from his town to worship and sacrifice to the Lord...
1 Samuel 1:3 (NIV)


Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays and other landmarks can be such painful reminders of the ticking of our biological clocks. Day like Mother's Day cause us to question God's plans as we struggle to figure out why God's withholding the desires of our hearts. If God promised that none of his people would miscarry or be barren (Exodus 23:26), is infertility a punishment for our sins?

While some see a simple cause/effect here (you sin, you can't have kids), under Old Testament law, both the promise and the punishment were corporate. God promised the nation of Israel, as a whole, protection, as a whole, when they obeyed His laws. When they, as a nation, turned their backs on Him as they had in Hannah's day, His veil of protection was lifted from their entire nation. Is our nation (with legalized abortion, homosexual marriage...) any more just today???

If sin = infertility, no one would be able to have children ever! A quick look around at children born out of wedlock, into abusive homes and more, is proof that this equation doesn't work. In fact, the Bible is clear that we all sin (Romans 3:23), and yet children are born continually. If you are living under a burden a guilt that your empty arms are a punishment from God, it's time to be free from the burden of false guilt and blame! In the natural course of a fallen, sinful world outside of God's protection, there will always be sad and sorrowful things that happen in this life.

Consider Job: "This man was blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil" (Job 1:1). So God rewarded Job's faithfulness by giving him a life free from suffering, right? Anything but! God allowed Satan to take everything from Job, including the lives of his children, his great wealth, his health, and even the understanding of friends. "In all this, Job did not sin" (2:10). (NIV)

We see another example of grief without blame in the gospel of Luke:
In the time of Herod king of Judea there was a priest named Zechariah, who belonged to the priestly division of Abijah; his wife Elizabeth was also a descendant of Aaron. Both of them were upright in the sight of God, observing all the Lord's commandments and regulations blamelessly. But they had no children, because Elizabeth was barren; and they were both well along in years.
- Luke 1:5-7, (emphasis added)

"Well, that's nice for Hannah, Job, Beth and Zac," you may think, "but I still know God must be judging me for my sins." But God says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:9). Paul, once a murderer and more, wrote, "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners - of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life" (1 Timothy 1:15-16).

No sin is too big. If you have admitted your past to God and repented, He has already offered His forgiveness, and He desires to wash you clean of guilt. Will you accept? If the God of all the universe has forgiven you and yet you will not forgive yourself, is this not insulting our sovereign God? Forgiveness must be accepted to be of any benefit!

Infertility hurts this much because you already have a mother's heart. God knows about grieving for children in a very personal way too. He has gone to greater measures to make you His child than you will ever go in the pursuit of growing your own family. I like to paraphrase John 3:16 this way: "For God so longed to call me His child, that He offered the life of His only biological Child, to pay the price of my adoption."

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Thoughts to ponder:
The Law that bound Hannah was established for the purpose of showing us that God's measure of perfect holiness is a standard too high for any human to obtain. Praise God for His grace and the gift of salvation!
Before this faith came, we were held prisoners by the law, locked up until faith should be revealed. So the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ that we might be justified by faith. Now that faith has come, we are no longer under the supervision of the law.
- Galatians 3:23-25 (NIV)


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Dear Lord, in this coming week as the world celebrates those who have what we most long for, please make yourself real to us, reminding us that our empty arms are not a curse, and that your loving Father's heart grieves with us. Hold us and comfort us as we grieve and give us grace, strength and peace to sustain us through especially painful days.